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For the past 45 years, Love and Logic has helped parents take good care of themselves by teaching them to set limits without, anger, lectures, threats, or repeated warnings—this is first rule of Love and Logic. By doing this, we help parents remain calm.

Today it is more important than ever to take care of ourselves because of the many stresses confronting us daily. Avoiding frustration, anger, lectures, and other ineffective parenting practices is no simple task in our hectic world. Fortunately, the following steps can help us “brainwash” ourselves into staying cool in hot situations:

Step #1: Create one calming self-statement.
Everyone needs a calming thought to carry with them as they navigate this not-so-calm world. Listed below are some examples:

  • Anger makes it worse.
  • Anger and frustration feed misbehavior.
  • Frustration fuels the fire.
  • Empathy instead of anger.
  • My kids will someday select my nursing home.

Step #2: Post your statement where you’ll see it often.
The more often you see your statement, the more likely it will pop into your head when your kids are getting on your last nerve. It’s great for them to see it too!

Step #3: Visualize yourself staying calm and using your statement.
Each night as you are falling asleep, imagine yourself in a tough parenting situation with your children—and handling it without breaking a sweat!

There still will be times when we feel like we can’t remain calm—we’re only human! When this happens, remember the Love and Logic Energy Drain technique. Just say, “Oh no, I’m having an energy drain.” For insights on how to use the Energy Drain technique, listen to our audio, Love and Logic Magic When Kids Drain Your Energy.

Thanks for reading!

If this is a benefit, forward it to a friend. Our goal is to help as many families as possible.

Dr. Charles Fay

*This is a repost of a Love and Logic blog and not our own content