Last week sometime I was going about my day when out of nowhere a thought came to my mind. “You are a disconnected mother”. There it was. So clear, so real, literally inside of my head.
At first it took my breath away. We were in the middle of moving house and the Little Heroes Art Auction (which is always amazing!) was around the corner. Life was full, I was tired and vulnerable and this accusation seemed plausible. But it wasn’t true. I paused, teetering on the threshold of coming into agreement with my thoughts, allowing myself to be swallowed by the insidious “mom-guilt” which breeds fear, insecurity and parenting from a white-knuckled place of overcompensation.
In the pause I felt the Holy Spirit speak a different word. He said, “It’s a lie. This isn’t the mother who I created you to be and it isn’t the mother who you are”. So I squared my shoulders and mentally dismissed the thought, choosing to rather live and parent from a place of love, wholeness and deep gratitude for His grace that makes up for all the shortfalls that I have as a mother. Instead of owning my thought and desperately trying to manufacture “connection” with my children, I leaned deeper into the truth that my loving Father speaks over me and let that truth and love overflow into my relationship with my boys.
2 Corinthians 10:5 tells us that we need to “demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” In Christ we have the power and authority to change our thoughts and live fully and wholly in freedom, love, joy and power.
As parents we need to constantly evaluate what we are coming into alignment with in our minds and the way that it affects how we live out our lives. Pause and see if what you are thinking is the truth or a lie. If it is true, then make the necessary changes. If it is a lie, my prayer for you is that you will have the discernment and courage to resist it and replace it with life-giving truth. Remember, “Thoughts are not facts – don’t believe everything you think!”
By Bianca Smith